ADHD and friendships: helping children with social life at school

School is about more than marks. Friendships shape how children feel about themselves and about going to school. Some children with ADHD find the social side tricky: they may interrupt, miss social cues, react quickly when upset or find it hard to wait for their turn. Others are kind, funny and well liked. As always, every child is different.

Why social situations can be hard

• Impulsivity: blurting things out or grabbing before asking.
• Inattention: drifting during conversations, missing parts of a joke or a game's rules.
• Emotions: quick frustration when a game does not go their way.
• Past experience: repeated correction may have damaged confidence.

How parents can help

• Practise at home. Role-play common situations, such as joining a game, taking turns and handling a disagreement.
• Coach, don't lecture. After an event, ask "what happened?" and "what could you try next time?" in a calm moment.
• Set up small playdates. One-to-one meetings often work better than big groups.
• Choose activities where they shine, such as sport, art, music or chess clubs, where friendships grow around shared interests.
• Teach simple scripts, like "Can I join?" or "I need a minute."
• Praise kind behaviour when you see it.

How teachers can help

• Pair the student with a supportive classmate.
• Give clear roles in group work.
• Notice and address teasing or exclusion.
• Teach and praise turn-taking.

What about teenagers?

Teens may feel more self-conscious. Respect their privacy, ask permission before discussing difficulties and encourage groups that fit their interests.

When to get extra help

Persistent loneliness, bullying or deep distress calls for help from a counsellor or psychologist. Social skills groups can be useful for some children.

Online friendships

Online games and chats can be a place of connection but also conflict. Keep conversations open and set sensible limits.

ZEKO's planned Study Rooms are meant for silent company, with no chat and no camera, so students can feel the presence of others without social pressure.